You Never Can Tell

April 17, 2006

Set in a seaside town, this play tells the story of Mrs. Clandon and her three children, Dolly, Philip and Gloria, who have just returned to England after an eighteen-year stay in Madeira. The children have no idea who their father is and, through a comedy of errors, end up inviting him to a family lunch. At the same time, a dentist named Mr. Valentine has fallen in love with the eldest daughter, Gloria. However, Gloria considers herself a modern woman and claims to have no interest in love or marriage. The play continues with a comedy of erros and confused identities, with the friendly and wise waiter, Walter (most commonly referred to as “William,” because Dolly thinks he resembles Mr. Shakespeare), dispensing his wisdom with the titular phrase “You Never Can Tell.”

Written by George Bernard Shaw in 1895-1896.


Mr. Valentine — Mr. James Ludwig
Dolly Clandon — Ms. Liz Morton
Philip Clandon — Mr. Simon Kendall
Gloria Clandon — Ms. Elena Shaddow
Mrs. Clandon — Ms. Tovah Feldshuh
Fergus Crampton — Mr. Paxton Whitehead
Waiter — Mr. George S. Irving
Finch McComas — Mr. Nick Wyman
Bohun — Mr. Allen Fitzpatrick
Narrators — Mr. John Martello and Ms. Charlotte Moore

Evening hosted by Mr. Howard Kissel

Produced and directed by Mr. David Staller

The Cast