You Never Can Tell

May 23, 2011

YOU NEVER CAN TELL is a charming light comedy set in an English seaside town and tells the story of Mrs. Clandon and her three children, Dolly, Phillip and Gloria, who have just returned to England after an eighteen-year stay in Madeira. The children have no idea who their father is and, without realizing, end up inviting him to a family lunch. At the same time a dentist named Mr. Valentine has fallen in love with the eldest daughter, Gloria. However, Gloria considers herself a modern woman and claims to have no interest in love or marriage. The play continues with a comedy of errors and confused identities, with the friendly and wise waiter dispensing his wisdom with the prophetic “…you never can tell.”

Written by George Bernard Shaw in 1896.


Dolly Clandon — Ms. Victoria Haynes
Valentine — Mr. Chad Kimball
Philip Clandon — Mr. Will Bradley
Gloria Clandon — Ms. Jessie Austrian
Mrs. Clandon — Ms. Lisa Banes
Mr. Crampton — Mr. Daniel Jenkins
The Waiter — Mr. Lenny Wolpe
Finch McComas — Mr. Nick Wyman
Walter Bohun — Mr. James Joseph O’Neil
Narrator — Ms. Charlotte Moore

Produced and directed by David Staller

The Cast of You Never Can Tell